I'm here!!

Written on Friday, June 17th, 2010 -

So, here I am, in South Africa, at Open Arms. And boy has it been a trip thus far…

The night before my flights, I was pretty much a disaster. Suffice it to say there were many tears. Despite the tearful goodbye to my parents, my flights went fairly well. I met a lovely man getting on my flight from Phoenix to Dulles who grew up in Zimbabwe and gave me the phone numbers of his best friends who live in South Africa (he told me to call them if I ever found myself in a pickle) – this was when I was terrified to leave, so his kindness was exceptionally helpful.

At the Dulles airport I talked to Reed for about an hour (which was lovely, thank you Reed, you always calm me down!) and watched the Australia-Germany World Cup game through a pub window (eek…Australia :/), and made a few tearful promised phone calls. The time passed way too quickly and I floundered to charge my phone enough to send a few last texts before I boarded my long plane ride from Dulles to Dakar, Senegal. The long flight was pretty uneventful. Luckily, I sat next to a lovely lady from South Africa who later gave me all sorts of great advice on what to see while I was hear (and suggested I try a grapetizer, which I did on my next flight, and loved it! – thank you to my plane partner!)

(On another note, the lights just went out at Open Arms…a common occurrence lately.)

We had a quick stopover in Dakar but didn’t get off the plane and then made our way to Johannesburg. Both flights I mostly slept, read, wrote in my journal, listened to Lady Antebellum’s album on my tv monitor and then watched “It’s Complicated” and half of “The Frog Princess.”

Upon my arrival in Jo’burg, I went through customs – incredibly painless (lights went back on by the way), and found my to the telephone counter where I could activate my phone. I then found my gate, called my mom, and found some dinner (Subway and a vitamin water – I wasn’t feeling very adventurous just then), and soon enough I was on my final flight from Jo’burg to East London. I sat next to lovely man and woman on that flight too, also from South Africa, who wrote down some Xhosa phrases for me (including Lobola, which is a kind of dowry) and chatted with me about various traditions and American politics. (It was very nice to be distracted on that flight so the hour and a half went very quickly.)

Once in East London, I found my bags straight away and the Open Arms driver spotted me right away. We had to wait for a bit for the volunteers, who had been out to dinner with Rosie, our South African friend, who’s birthday it was and then we all drove over to get milkshakes on our way back to Open Arms. It was great to meet all the volunteers (and Rosie) who are all so wonderful – Caitlin, Katelyn (both from Notre Dame), Alyssa (from St. Olaf), Alyssa, Lauren (from Texas A&M), and Zach (from Arizona). Unfortunately Alyssa and Lauren would be leaving the next morning.

We made our way up to Open Arms in the dark and I was pretty dazed by the whole experience. I didn’t see much on the way there and we arrived at Open Arms in the pitch black at around 10:45pm here and went straight to the girls room, called a Rondeville (I’m sure I’m butchering that…) – or the “Purple House” as the kids call it. (I can’t post pictures just yet, our internet’s too slow, but if you want to see a picture it’s on the Open Arms website and the facebook group.) Our room’s pretty sweet. We have six bunk beds and six dressers, a bathroom with two sinks, a bathtub, shower, and two toilets, and it’s all pretty cozy and large. The only problem is there’s no heat – and boy is it cold at night!! It’s winter here, so it gets very chilly, but I’ve finally figured out that if I sleep in sweats, socks, a sweatshirt, in my sleeping back, under my ND blanket (yes, I brought it), and under the comforter, I’m set!

Well, that first night was pretty miserable. It took me about 4-5 hours to fall asleep, during which I time I just kept panicking. I’m going to be here for a year?!?! I thought. I cried a lot that night, hopefully silently so that the other girls didn’t notice…

I finally fell asleep and woke up around noon the next day, only to find all the other volunteers leaving (to take Alyssa and Lauren to East London and say goodbye.) I was terrified. They showed me the main house in the daylight (and the office) and where I could eat something…but that was kind of disheartening. I met some of the kids then and it was pure madness. One kid, who I have come to know as Siphomandla, pronounced See-po-man-la (I’m totally butchering the spelling of their names right now…) came up to me and kept pointing at me and asking “Why is she crying?” (I wasn’t by the way, but I was certainly on the verge!).

I went back to our room and the other girls left. Meanwhile, I started sobbing uncontrollably. I couldn’t believe I was here and by myself. I lost it and made a couple frantic phone calls. Emily managed to calm me down a bit (I knew she’d be awake at that time!) and I managed to compose myself enough to start organizing my clothes. I settled down to get things done but then there was a knock at the door – it was Asekhona, (the oldest child at Open Arms) – the girls had called me to get a number out of the office for them. As Asekhona was leaving I remembered she’d said that she was going to watch the Parent Trap, so I joined them in the TV room and met the older kids (it was lala time for the little ones, which means nap time). I got to meet lots of kids and read a little with Xholelani, pronounced Ko-lay-lawn-ee and felt a little better that night. The other volunteers came back that night with Rosie and we all watched the Brazil-North Korea game, made bracelets, ate popcorn, and played in a dominos tourney (on-going) – which was wonderful!

The next day was good, I learned lots more of their names and watched more movies, soccer, and got into the swing of things. I also got to eat more (sampa, broccoli, and beef). I also got peed on (woops!) and learned to jump rope in the proper South African way by the mamas and a few of the girls. That night we tried to play games with the older boys in the green house, which went well for a bit, but then after the power went out for about the fifth time, the lights came on and two of the boys were sobbing uncontrollably. Then another one started and we could not figure out for the life of us why! Finally we let the mamas take care of it (after about 45 minutes) and went and watched the South Africa-Uruguay game with a few of the mamas, Asekhona and Ayabunga (the second oldest) – what a travesty of a game! After the game, I called my parents, who it was wonderful to talk to, and always make me feel better about being here, but who also informed me that Tabs had passed away. It was a rough night dealing with that information – I loved him very much and miss him a lot and feel bad for not saying a proper goodbye, but we have some great memories.

This morning was good too. We went into Komga this morning to the store where I bought a Coke (delicious!) and a soccer magazine (which promptly got ripped to shreds by the children, I’ve learned my lesson…) and some of the kids went to the library (I love that they love to read, even if they are a bit behind!). Then this afternoon I met Auntie Jeanine, the behavioral psychologist and we went over what I would be doing for the next few weeks. I’m going to take ten of the kids at a time into the playroom and stimulate their problem solving and motor skills. Then we have a break and then we have creative time in the crèche (the preschool) where they do what they missed in the morning while they were with me. She did the first session today to show me, so my first one by myself is tomorrow! Wow! We’ll see how it goes. The most challenging part of it all is that I’m not supposed to be their friend. That’s gonna be hard, especially after the past few days, it’s definitely a delicate balance.

I do love these kids though. Open Arms is a funny place. Most of the time is screaming, kicking, crying, fighting, spitting up, and all that – but it’s also laughing, singing, hugging, kissing, cuddling, and smiling. It’s the most interesting of balances but you know that the kids are giving you all the love they have (even if sometimes they’re mad at you) and you’re giving it right back. I can’t believe I’ve only been here for three days. It feels like an eternity.

And I won’t lie, much of the time, I’m scared. I’m not sure exactly what I’m doing or if I’ll be any good, but I’m just learning to take it one day at a time, one kid at a time, one smile at a time. Open Arms is truly a beautiful place though. (And I’m not only referring to the beautiful sunset I accidentally caught out my window the other morning or the gorgeous stars at night.)

Alright, well now it’s time to go and watch the France-Mexico World Cup game (a nightly staple for the volunteers at Open Arms!).

I love you all and I miss you lots and I will try to get pictures of any way I can.

Thank you for the phone calls, the e-mails, and everything else! I haven’t been able to check my facebook or respond to many of my e-mails (the internet is very, very slow here) but I will do my best!

With love from “Auntie Kitten” (yes, that is what they call me…although Asekho got “Key-ton, like ‘the key’” today which made me happy!) More to come!